back at the beginning

Once upon a time there was a girl who had big dreams, a lot of kids (for her) and a computer. She felt like she had something to share. As a forerunner for the lead in “Clueless in blogging” – she started one. Uh oh. After 3 disastrous years, feeling like she had a big “L” tattooed on her forehead, she let it vanish into the big ol’ internet universe.

2 years later…

The girl feels that she still wants to share, feels she is still meant for her big dreams and has read a blog or two….or three. She decides to try again. Gulp. The end.

Ok, pretty obvious that the girl is me and the blog is this one and that was the very short sum up of what went down. I started a blog, it was crap, I let it go. I didn’t figure I would write in that way again but here and there over the past 2 years I have had twinges and inner pokes to share. For the most part they were ignored.

The last time I got one of these inclinations I decided to actually ponder it a bit longer. What if I changed the things I knew were not working.  Contemplating how I have changed and how I am different now, two years later, would that make a difference? How do I share the multitude of things I am passionate about in a focused, fun and positive way? And would I be courageous enough to share in a way that is ORIGINAL, EXPANSIVE, GLOWING, REAL and  FAITHFUL?(more on those words to come)

When I started to be able to answer some of these questions, I actually started to consider the idea of starting over. Instead of seeing my first attempt as a big neon ” F” flashing in my face, seeing it instead as a time of  learning and, hopefully this time around – a  time of growth and true sharing. (I know cliche…but that’s the truth of it).

I’ll admit that starting over, right from the very beginning brings up a lot of feelings of failure  for me. It would have been easier for me to start something new, something that had a new name and that needed new words. But, that wouldn’t push me where I need to go.  And the vision I hold today is not that different than I had before, it’s just refined, and hopefully more me. So, while it’s outside of my comfort zone, it’s where I need to stay.  In the next few posts I will share my vision and focus so you’ll know if you want to stick around and then reasons why this blog might be for you (or not).

I’m excited as words and ideas brew, exploring what we can find, back at the beginning.

With Joyful Grace,
Shanta xo


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